Live and Learn Part 2.5: All I want is some f***in’ carrots!

One thing that I really like about conferences is that I feel an intense amount of freedom. Any hang-ups I might have in real life seem to completely disappear when I’m surrounded by unschoolers. I also realize how strong social pressure can be at home. Once it’s lifted, I feel as though I could float along effortlessly. This is what I’m working toward in real life. Not just the conferences. One thing I also appreciate very much is the feeling of emotional safety. Both Skylar and Milo had their moments during the week. Yet, I didn’t get disapproving stares, and I didn’t wish they would stop. I was just grateful that they could be themselves and let it go when and how they needed to.

One particularly difficult moment was at the very end of the conference. Skylar had just about had enough of the food. (I’ve decided that I’m not talking about the food at the conference. It’s just too hard. I’m afraid I’ll have nightmares!) So on top of being tired, he was hungry, and probably really sad that he was leaving. We found him in our van sobbing. When we tried to help he only screamed at us. And this is what he screamed. “All I want is some f***in’ CARROTS!!!” Tj and I were on opposite sides of the van with the sliding doors open. We both smiled and held back giggles. We weren’t laughing at him. We were connecting over a moment where we had the same thought at the same time. It’s so wonderful that in a moment of intense frustration we didn’t need to minimize Skylar’s feelings by asking him not to swear. We were able to listen to him, hearing that word, (a word I tend to use all too often myself) and know just how pissed off he really was.

I didn’t have any carrots. We were minutes from leaving so I ran and got him a soda, knowing that he was probably thirsty. Tara, Justin, and Zeb came over to say good-bye. We couldn’t get the kids out of the van for a picture so we just settled for pictures in the van.

Good-byes are hard. Meeting Tara and family was definitely one of the highlights of my trip. We’ve been “internet buddies” for quite a long time. We met on the MySpace homeschooling board and jumped ship around the same time and have been co-moderating the Unschooling board for awhile now. I would say our two families meshed together really well. I wish I could have spent more time talking to her but we went in different directions a lot. So is life with small children. We seriously need to move closer together. Las Vegas and “Rut-Vegas” (as my town is affectionately nicknamed) are just too far apart.

When we finally did get home, we made a list and TJ made a bee-line for the grocery store. He brought home 3 bags of carrots for Skylar. On one of those bags he wrote “f***in” right next to the word carrots. He walked up to Skylar and said, “Here you go, I felt so badly for you the other day that I wanted to make sure that I got you some f***in carrots as soon as we got home”. He handed the bag to Skylar and we all laughed hysterically for a good few minutes. Really, it was hilarious. Skylar even asked, “Did that COME on the bag!?! Or did you write it?!?”