I’ve been meaning to touch on this subject for awhile now, but I’ve been hesitant. I’m not a gamer. I don’t feel drawn to playing video games like the rest of my family does, so I often feel a little at a loss to explain it. This post inspired me to finally write a few things that I’ve had in the back of my brain for while now. Kelli has three awesome teenagers and avid (or at one time) gamers. Her family is an absolute joy to be around, and none of those stereotypes about kids who play too many video games apply.
My kids love video games and I love watching them play. I love the joy on their faces when they discover something new and seeing the accomplishment they feel when they figure out a problem. They are experiencing learning, fulfillment, and joy. I see:
Reading-Math-Science-Geography-History-Civics-Politics-Strategy-Critical thinking-Time management-Hand-eye coordination-Delayed gratification-Challenge-Perseverance-Teamwork-Music appreciation-Art appreciation-Greater understanding of technology-Resource management-Multi-tasking
The list doesn’t end there, in fact the list of skills acquired from gaming are too many to mention in one teensy blog post. Maybe they shouldn’t be called video games at all, maybe they should be called “complete on-screen experiences”, because that’s exactly what they are.
Ever since the media has gotten a hold of Unschooling, I keep seeing comments that all seem to express the same sentiment, that video games are a complete waste of time (apparently the military doesn’t think so) and that allowing your children unlimited computer or video game time is a bad idea. I wanted to explore the reasoning behind the “video games will rot your brain” theory, but I’m having trouble coming up with any well researched and valid points that point to the negative. I picked three of the most common myths and included some links.
Video games will rot your brain. If you can show me a rotted brain from video game playing, I’ll eat my shoe. Yes, seriously. I’m that confident. I wish people would stop saying this ridiculous comment. Even in the worst of circumstances, it seems to me that playing video games will exercise your brain whether you like it or not. I wonder why these doctors would play a video game right before entering surgery if video games would rot their brains. Or why they are recommended for seniors experiencing subsyndromal depression. While I’m pointing out examples, don’t pilots often train or hone their skills on elaborate flight simulators?
Video games are addictive. This amazing world develops something as awesome, powerful, and life changing as video games and of course we start calling it addictive. It holds people’s attention, it captivates and challenges minds of every age and that’s a bad thing? Short attention spans are bad, now long attention spans are bad? I’m confused. When did passion turn into addiction? Check out: Don’t Bother Me Mom, I’m Learning and from my “must read” section How Video Games Blind Us With Science.
Video Games make kids socially inept. How does this theory hold up in a society of MMORPG’s (Massively Multiplayer Online Role Playing Games)? Games often need to be solved by a team of people. My two boys work together to create new worlds and solve challenges regularly. Video games are incredibly social.
Here’s a great piece by PBS, dispelling some of the other myths surrounding video games. Reality Bytes: Eight Myths About Video Games Debunked
Would you believe me if I told you my kids are never bored?
It’s true, they are practically never bored. Since Skylar came home from school, I can probably count the times he has said, “Mom, I’m bored” on my hands and feet. The “I’m bored”‘s have lessened over time and now I can’t remember the last time I heard that phrase. He never says it anymore. He learned how to be bored in school. He went to school, sat through mundane lessons, did what he was told (errr… was supposed to anyway), and learned to sit quietly while blankly staring at the front of the room. Boring.
I don’t think it’s the teachers fault at all. I had some really awesome teachers in my life. The one teacher that comes to mind taught the class “Nature of Man”. He was fabulous. Exciting, engaging, and he obviously loved what he was teaching. I didn’t do well in his class, but that was more due to the fact that I never felt the drive to get good grades. They didn’t matter much to me. What I did do however was have a lot of fun in that class. Still, even Mr. Peterson couldn’t cure my boredom. I loved pottery. I could have been in the pottery studio all day most days. Pottery was the reason my gym teacher took mercy on me for being so completely disengaged in his class. I brought in a piece I had finished, left it on the bleachers during class and by the end of the day I learned that my failing grade would be turned into a passing one. He said, “I see that gym just isn’t your thing”. The seemingly not-so-nice-guy, turned out OK. It didn’t really take away the belittling he did to a lot of other kids that year, but it helped a little.
The problem is that until that point no one ever realized what I would have rather been doing. It didn’t matter. What matters is what needs to get done; that the goals and tests set by bureaucracy are met. Some kids may choose the lesson plan. Most, I think, would not. What the student would like to be doing is completely irrelevant during the school hours. It doesn’t matter. What matters is what he or she *has* to be doing. There lies the cause of boredom. It’s not that there is nothing to do, it’s that they can’t do what they want to do and it becomes nearly impossible to focus on the task at hand when their mind is somewhere else. This is my experience and I’m sure it’s not everyone’s experience but there isn’t a student out there who wouldn’t like to be doing something else at some time during school.
Choice Matters
It matters what a child wants to be doing. A child’s interests are the gateway to basic knowledge. Their curiosity leads to greater understanding of the things we might see as fundamental. Teaching the fundamentals first, as if we needed them before we can enjoy a particular subject, is ridiculous. Learning comes from living, from enjoying, from curiosity, but if the child isn’t interested in the subject he isn’t really learning, and if the child is told he can’t learn about it any other way that stops him from learning about it when he is ready. When you are curious, you can’t be bored.
It is a miracle that curiosity survives formal education. ~Albert Einstein
Astra Taylor said once in an interview that her mom used to say to her, “If you’re bored, you’re boring.” I don’t think that I would ever say this to a child. It’s kind of nasty really, especially to an overly sensitive child. However, after reading that, it sort of clicked in my adult mind. Yeah…that’s true! If I’m bored, then it’s because I’m boring. I shared it with my brother, who also felt it resonate within him. I think we are taught to be boring. Years of being told what to do and taught to follow direction won’t make a very motivated group of people, will it?
Revive Your Curiosity and Cure Your Boredom
Watch a small child. Children start out curious. When Milo enters a new situation, he finds something interesting about every 5 feet. He is curious about the world around him. He asks a lot of questions. His curiosity will guide him through life long learning.
Be a tourist in your town. Start where you are. Hit up the chamber of commerce. Visit landmarks and points of interest. What would a tourist do in your town?
Read blogs. I love reading blogs. I get so many good ideas from bloggers. It also gives me a little window into someone’s life. My curiosity about people drives me to learn more.
Talk to people. At our house, there are rocks and gems built into the stone walls and massive pieces of petrified wood lining the stairs. I know the owner used to work for the transportation department. I want to know more, we’ve been asking a lot of questions.
Kids don’t have to try to be curious. They don’t even have to name it. It’s just there, driving them to move forward. Adults who have spent large amounts of time in school or in strict households maybe need a boost. I used to be a serious daydreamer, but most of it turned into just spacing out by having to sit in school. Slowly, I regained my curiosity and I’m so thrilled to have my guide back.
Almost all kids enter the system immensely curious. But after a few years in the Boring Institute, most kids are nodding off, texting their friends or disappearing inside their own brains. Soon they only really care about grades. For many even that, too, dissipates and dropping out starts to feel like a relief. In time. they’ll be learning everything there is to know about Kim Kardashian, Brad Pitt and Kate Gosselin. – Albert Nerenberg
Thank you, thank you for this post! I have a son that is a World of Warcrack LOL player. He is embarrassed to tell people because of the stereotype of it all. The thing is he is one of the most amazing artists I have ever seen! He also used games to fill a void after he got off drugs, so I love gaming!
Our six year old has begun on computers and she loves them. She can find her own games as well as watch youtube videos and chat. We just gave her a laptop and watched her explore, it has been amazing.
We don’t limit her time on computer, but she does it on her own. Every couple of hours she will jump up and play with the puppy or some other activity. Now we are just watching to see if she hooks up with her brother and starts beating him online
Thanks again and pura vida.
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The only time Otto claims to be bored is when he’s uncomfortable in social situations–I don’t like how it’s going with this person, can you get me into another situation or at least come and run interference, please. I don’t think I’ve ever heard Lauren say she was bored–there are always BOOKS to read or stories to write or people to talk to!
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My son has been thinking about video games this week, too! This is his take on why games are great
http://sunriseovertheiceberg.wordpress.com/2010/04/27/in-depth-on-no-screens-week-at-the-library/
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Heather Reply:
April 27th, 2010 at 6:15 pm
@Heather – Great blog by your son.
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As always you rock! Such a smart post. I love that my kids are never bored. In fact, none of us are ever bored. It’s more typical my kids need to back away and take down time.
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“It holds people’s attention, it captivates and challenges minds of every age and that’s a bad thing? Short attention spans are bad, now long attention spans are bad? I’m confused.”
Love this. I’m confused too.
I can relate a lot to your experience with school.
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Thanks for encouraging us to take a fresh look at video games.
You may enjoy having a look at http://epistemicgames.org, the website of some people in my neck of the woods (Wisconsin) who are investigating the intersection of learning & computer games. Pretty serious fun there!
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I’ve got a post in the making about video games and the science as to how they are good for you. One of these days I may get it finished. But it’s not a passion of mine so right now I find the topic boring. Justin is going to sit down with me soon so I can channel some of his enthusiasm to finish it up.
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Heather Reply:
April 27th, 2010 at 6:06 pm
@Andrew – I’d like to read that book! Thanks for the recommendation.
@Tara – I think I’ve only written about it once before. I get they love it, but it isn’t my thing either.
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Very nice. I believe I see many kids unable to use their free time creatively when they finally do get some down time, because they are just plain used to being told what to do. I don’t know when my generation got so controlling, or why we did, but for some reason, we seem to have it in our minds that we need to control what the kids eat, when they sleep, how they behave and what games they should be playing. I try hard to break my need to control these things, but sometimes it is very hard! But after 2 years of letting the boys be “free” of my controlling nature, I see some amazing play that rarely results in boredom. In fact, our minds seem to be so busy we can hardly squeeze all of our interests in to a day! We always run out of time. Thanks for the post, I had fun thinking about all these things.
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Great post Heather and thanks for the kind words. You might like WoW
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So, I was thinking about your blog title and realized there is another way to say it.
“If you’re bored, maybe your life is boring.”
I think many parents aren’t engaged enough in their kids life. And when they are feeling bored, it’s really because they need the fun, interesting interactions only we as facilitators can provide.
I know that any time any of us has been bored, it’s been because life had taken a serious turn toward mundane. Same shit, day in and day out. And I don’t think you need to travel in an RV to change it. Sometimes we just need boosts, injections of newness, things you never really thought about doing before.
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Heather Reply:
April 28th, 2010 at 7:50 am
@Tara – Curiosity?
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Quit writing so many cool posts with so many cool links, wouldya? I’ve got things to do!
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woohoo! I have serendiptuously come by your bog from noticing your title on other blogs I have visited lately and I love it!! It’s reading blogs like yours that makes me feel at one with the universe
hehe.
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sorry, actually my url is not the above. it’s this one
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I have an always-unschooled child who expresses boredom a lot. I wouldn’t tell her, “Maybe you’re boring.” She plays solitary and social video games, she Skypes with friends, she watches TV, she reads, she creates, she takes lessons, participates in groups, and she sees her friends several times per week. She always wants more time with her friends. She’s never particularly enjoyed solitary activities or entertaining herself, so when she gets lonely she claims to be “bored.”
Even with adults, I think there’s more to the problem of boredom than being “boring.” Many people don’t believe they have the right to pursue their own interests because that is what most of us are taught by our parents and by our schooling. Maybe rather than saying, “You’re boring,” we could help them “deschool” by questioning why they might be unable to find interesting things to do. If we express interest in them, maybe we can help them begin to understand that it’s okay to be interested in themselves.
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Heather Reply:
April 30th, 2010 at 5:51 am
@Cheryl – When I heard that her mother had said it to her I was surprised. It’s not a particularly nice sentiment.
I see people use the word bored a lot, but maybe it the wrong context too. Like you said, some kids use it to describe lonely or even other feelings. For me, I don’t want to be boring, especially a boring parent, so when I heard that sentiment, it made me think. 
I like what you like what you wrote about adults feeling not free to pursue their own interests. It’s very true. It’s usually from adults that I hear “I can’t”, “It’s silly”, or “not enough time”. Thanks Cheryl.
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You got me thinking. I meandered in my own blog:
http://web.me.com/jaquis/Through_Seans_Eyes/Gaming_Blog/Gaming_Blog.html
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Heather Reply:
May 4th, 2010 at 10:13 am
Cool! I like to make people think.
I enjoyed reading your process, even if I don’t completely agree.
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Thank you Heather. Not only do I enjoy reading what you write, I completely agree with what you write. Thank you for using your talent to educate others to the value, opportunities and family life unschooling offers. And thank you for offering support and encouragement to those of us doing it who face others day in and day out that are not very understanding or supportive.
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My daughter went from unschooled to schooled and in a month will be going back to unschooled…
Just today she told me she was bored. Second time she said it this week. Couldn’t help think that the longer she was in school, the more often she complained about being bored…don’t read deeply into that…for me complaining more than once a month is an o’ no!
So true how the more “schooled” the kid is the more likely they are to be bored. How can you figure out how to get “unbored” if you are always being told what to do in school?
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Great blog… glad to have stumbled upon it!
I think you have made some excellent points about video games, but I did want to drop some information your way about the whole “rotting brain” issue. Clearly it is just one piece of a VERY complex puzzle, but since you said you hadn’t found any evidence of it I thought I would share…
http://www.sosparents.org and http://www.killology.com/book_stop_summary.htm
Both of these sites have some compelling information about the impact violent video games and movies have on the development of the adolescent brain.
Again, like I said, the issue is so complex… but scientia est potentia!
Here’s to being interesting! Cheers!
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bored or boring…. we’re going through this now too with 14 year old sons. I think part of it is that they’re feeling as if now that they’re so immensely old, hanging with parents isn’t as desirable as it once was and they don’t have tons of friends, but also because i’ve been super busy with work and haven’t been as engaged. and also, now that i think of it, i think i might expect them to be bored, self imposing my lame-ass public school dreariness on them. i agree with Tara… time for an injection of newness.
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Awesome!!
I got here from UnschoolingBlog.com, and I have to say – I’m impressed! I’m also in the same boat – and not rockin’ it. My husband and kiddos are gamers and there is nothing wrong with that!
I look forward to reading more.
Warmly,
~h
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Heather Reply:
June 24th, 2010 at 9:30 pm
Thanks guys. We just got Little Big Planet and my kids have been playing it nonstop for days. I’m thrilled to see them happily engaged and learning.
I also love the game!
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